Senioritis: There’s More to it Than You Might Think
By Chris Allen - Faculty
There is a sickness going around. It happens this time every year. Its infection rate is almost 100%. And worst of all…there is not much you can do about it. Senioritis. It’s the yearly transformation of normally responsible students into the academic equivalent of a teenage sloth. Students who are typically involved in school and motivated to make good grades are sick and tired of being involved and seemingly couldn’t care less about what kind of grades they are making. This can be a frustration for teachers and a point of tension between seniors and their parents.
If you are a teacher or a parent to a teenager afflicted with Senioritis, don’t fret. First of all, this is a temporary condition that will pass in a few months. Secondly, I am convinced that their change in attitude is, in some twisted way, God’s way of preparing us for and even helping us to welcome their looming departure. In the meantime, we can try to help our teens navigate through the final months of high school by understanding that there is more to senioritis than meets the eye. The following three areas might help you better understand the mind of your teenager and possibly look for opportunities to talk with them about the upcoming changes in their lives. IF you can get them to listen that is.
Let me preface these words of wisdom by saying this… if you try to force a conversation about these things with your teenagers, they will likely look at you like you have melons growing out of your ears. As with all things in the teenage world, timing is everything. Find the right moment to bring this stuff up. Remember, ultimately they are just ready to graduate.
I am excited…I am scared. There is no doubt about it; seniors are just ready to graduate. They are incredibly excited about breaking out of the “Dar bubble” and testing their wings on the rest of the world. Behind that excitement, however, are some fears. “Am I really ready for what comes next”? “Will I be able to handle the college workload”? “Will I be able to handle the freedom that I am about to have”? Believe it or not, our seniors are really asking themselves these questions. They see being out on their own as one of the first big tests in their lives. Don’t be afraid to ask them about their concerns and their fears. You might be surprised at what they have to say.
I am happy… I am sad. In so many ways, this is such a wonderful time of year to be a student. Most of the seniors have at least been accepted to college. They are already celebrating with their friends and literally counting down the days. (I have actually learned that in regards to counting down the days, there really is “an app for that”.) The flipside to all of this joy, however, is that most of our seniors are leaving a place, and people, that they truly love. Especially at a school like Darlington, where relationships are the hallmark of all that we do, there is some genuine grief that accompanies the joy of moving on. Saying goodbye is not an easy thing for teenagers. They so often just do not have the words to put with the emotions they are feeling. We can help them find those words by asking them what they are going to miss the most. Which teachers are they going to miss? Which friends will they miss? Help them brainstorm ways that they can say goodbye to the people that have made the Darlington experience so special for them.
I am proud…I have some regrets. Finally, this is a time for seniors to relish in their accomplishments. The fact that they have made it to graduation at a school like Darlington is a huge accomplishment itself. In addition to graduating, our seniors have excelled in so many areas on campus, including leadership positions, the arts, sports and many others. Spend these final months encouraging your teenager to acknowledge all that he or she has to be proud of. Keep in mind, however, that seniors may be holding on to some regrets that you may not be aware of. They might wish they would have tried out for something that they were too scared to go for at the time. Or, maybe they wish they had not made some decisions that they made during their high school career, or regret that they didn’t win that big game. Some students may even be questioning whether or not it was really worth it to put in so many hours studying when they could have maybe spent more time with friends, while others are regretting that they didn’t hit the books harder. Whatever they may be, it is without doubt that your senior has some regrets about high school, and he or she is probably thinking about these more now than ever. Try to find an appropriate time to let your senior talk about these regrets. It may be a good teachable moment to let your senior know that regrets are a part of life and that the most important thing is that we learn from them so that they are not repeated. College, after all, is a fresh start. It is the perfect time to put into practice the lessons learned in high school.
So, when your senior suddenly seems like he or she is having a personality change and you don’t know what in the world to do about it, remember that there really is a lot more going on inside that 12th grade mind than we see on the surface. Sometimes it takes just a little digging to get to what is really on the inside. If you can actually get them to talk about it, I promise, you won’t regret it.
