Is Facebook Your Therapist?
By Max Roach - FF/S
I love Facebook. It has revolutionized the way people connect and stay connected. Recently though, I have become increasingly aware of an odd and potentially unhealthy relationship that people have with social media. It seems to me that computer “friends” and “friends of friends” have become a kind of quasi-therapy for many - children and adults alike. People often post comments about the fact that they had a hard day, someone hurt their feelings, rant about some injustice, criticize other people or institutions, etc.
This is, of course, all very public and very permanent. Any comment made can be screen-shot, downloaded and preserved forever by people and institutions we don’t know. Being a school administrator, I have people bring me printouts of what people have said online all the time. What’s worse is that often, a comment made invites people to make additional comments in response. To add insult to injury, your name and picture is often shown clearly right alongside whatever anyone else posts. We cannot control how people will respond. This has profound implications when we consider that we represent more than just ourselves. Do you represent or are you affiliated with a school, company or even a family that would appreciate your name being so publicly associated with your comments and those of others? Yet somehow, people continue to post about their most intimate issues, and open them up for public discussion. All of this smacks of airing one’s dirty laundry in public.
And then it hit me… What ever happened to calling your mom with hurt feelings? Your grandpa for advice? Your Minister? Rabbi? Bishop? Or even a therapist? Despite all the love and support we feel in a social network community, it lacks the most valuable component of real support, reassurance or guidance - the human component. No measure of online connections can make up for one trusted shoulder to cry on. No amount of social media reassurances can recreate words of wisdom, heard in person, from a trusted advisor.
The irony here is not lost on me. I chuckle to think that I am writing a blog- the not-so-distant cousin of “Twittering” and “Face-Spacing.” While we do not know what the jobs and professional demands will be required of the next generation’s workforce, they will certainly need to be masters of technology. I would argue, however, that the world will need, in greater amounts than ever, people who can connect to each other and collaborate face-to-face.
Each of us has times of challenge and turmoil. We all have a need to vent, feel loved, engage with differences of opinion, receive sage advice, etc. Might I suggest a retro approach? Let’s re-define “connected.” If this strikes a chord in you, go talk to someone about it.
