Usually, when parents think of their child’s potential career success as an adult, they think of academics and the best college possible. A 4.0 average and a diploma from a top college are certainly what every parent hopes for their child, but that is not the single indicator of success. The skills, effort, knowledge and persistence that come from a strong academic record are a key underpinning, but the people who are most successful in their field have emotional intelligence.
Daniel Goldman is a psychologist and author who made emotional intelligence known to the public with his book of the same title in 1995. Since then, research and publication in this topic have exploded. This month, the Upper School learning specialists, Academic Dean David Powell, and teachers Phil Titus and Gregg Marshall will be traveling to Boston to attend the annual Leaning and the Brain Conference, and this year’s topic is emotional intelligence. (
Click here to read more about the conference.)
So, what does emotional intelligence look like in a person? One would observe a person who is self-aware and self-honest in a humble but self-enhancing way. Importantly, they consistently regulate their emotions; and they focus well because they are so adept at managing anxiety and attention. Consequently, they are motivated and positive. They have excellent executive function. They empathize well and are socially skilled. It has been repeatedly proven by research that leaders with emotional intelligence bring measurable good results to their company or employer. There are different styles of successful leadership, but the leader with emotional intelligence creates good results that last over time.
When can a person start to build the skills of emotional intelligence? It may surprise you to know at a very young age, but any time is possible if a person is committed and wants to change. Adults today are all too aware of an increasingly complex world flooded by information, activity and stress, but children are growing up with it. It is, therefore, not surprising that increasing numbers of children have elevated levels of generalized anxiety. Anxiety robs focus and attention and thus the ability to perform skills well and comfortably. These kids are not happy and, if they do not get help, they can develop unwanted bad habits and behaviors.
Dr. Goleman makes the point that the time has come to teach attention skills: how to calm body and mind, and focus attention. This is fundamental to building emotional intelligence. From here, the other related skills (previously mentioned) can be taught and coached; all children can benefit; for some, it would be life changing. Of course, adults can benefit from coaching in emotional intelligence as well, so if you are interested,
click here to read an article to get you started.
I will post another blog on emotional intelligence soon after we return from Boston.
